Miami Dolphins
1020 3040 50 4030 2010
THE
THE DOLPHIN TANK
R E V I E W
"Dolphins News So Fake You'd Swear the Perfect Season Is Happening Again This Year."
1020 3040 50 4030 2010
Miami Dolphins
Breaking
Miami heat index once again ruled unofficial extra defensive lineman for home games 1972 perfect season once again invoked as the franchise standard, current roster politely nods Aqua and orange jerseys voted most visible uniform from a beach chair three miles away Hard Rock Stadium humidity reportedly responsible for at least one fourth-quarter cramp per game Dolphins fans remind league the undefeated season technically still stands, half a century strong Miami heat index once again ruled unofficial extra defensive lineman for home games 1972 perfect season once again invoked as the franchise standard, current roster politely nods Aqua and orange jerseys voted most visible uniform from a beach chair three miles away Hard Rock Stadium humidity reportedly responsible for at least one fourth-quarter cramp per game Dolphins fans remind league the undefeated season technically still stands, half a century strong

Perfect Season Pending Column Renewed For The 53rd Consecutive Year

Editors describe the renewal as 'a formality, historically.'

Marino Vault Reports Record Visitor Traffic, Decades Later

Curators describe interest as 'undiminished by the absence of a ring.'

Fins Up Segment Reports Steady, Enthusiastic Readership

Producers describe the numbers as 'consistent with expectations.'

Front Office Insists Dolphins Are 'In On Everybody' This Cycle

The phrase has now been issued across multiple humid offseasons.

Hafley Praises Offense's 'Rhythm' Following A Drive That Stalled At Midfield

He confirmed the rhythm was, at minimum, present.

Rookie Surprised By Turnout At A Humid Walkthrough

Thirty reporters attended. Four asked about the heat.

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